I thought the drug offer spam would die down now that the holidays are over, but there's been a sudden surge of them again. I can only conclude that either spammers consider Valentine's another holiday that needs drugs to get through, or someone has been telling someone I'm desperately in need of Valium. One morning it took me an hour just to get rid of the valium spam and that was after my filter had done what it could. 

Does anyone EVER open those things? Or the ones with randomly generated subject lines? I mean, spam-people, come on! If you can't generate a coherent subject line, why on earth would I open your spam and actually read it?

All right, moving on from spam, it's February, it's GORGEOUS outside. So why are my thoughts turning to retreats? That's retreatS, not retreat as in running away--well, only sort of. For some reason, this time of year, I start browsing writer retreat sites and dreaming of uninterupted writing time in cabins that are a) rustic, but b) still equipped with all the mod-cons, including spa-like bathrooms. 

I'm not alone in this. The discussion on what of my lists is about finding balance between business and personal life. Author Liana Laverentz, has written a couple of articles about finding balance here and here and contributed some good suggestions to a lively discussion. What I realized, yet again, is that women spend a lot of time taking guilt trips. Maybe we can't help it, but we should at least know when we're doing it and make sure it's a choice. 

Probably the best thing we can do for ourselves, if we can't retreat, is to be more forgiving and more kind--or at least as kind to ourselves as we are to others. We can also make sure we have a good support group of friends who help us feel better about ourselves, not worse. I'm in awe of the women in my life, my sister, my daughters, my mom, my dear friends who life me up when I'm down and turn to me when they need lifting. Throughout history, women have created these communities of support, so if you're considering retreat, just make sure it's from the right things--and not from the important people in your life. :-)
Perilously yours,
Pauline